Hello darkness my old friend.

This post was inspired by the prompt on : Retrospective

ret·ro·spec·tive
ˌretrəˈspektiv/
adjective
adjective: retrospective
  1. looking back on or dealing with past events or situations.

I feel obligated as a mother to be a well rounded individual. To have resolved demons from my past- to be happy, healthy, and whole.

But here is a secret… my old demons still keep me up at night.

Rather it seems they keep me company. Most days they are nothing more than a present thought. Not so invasive as just there. But some days when my defenses have been particularly battered they come to play with my insecurities like a game of cat and mouse. On those days, the smallest speed bump feels like overcoming a mountain.

I can’t afford to succumb to the siren call of depression. To draw the blinds and melt into the couch. I have a bright eyed little boy who looks at me with all the curiosity, and bright eyed innocence in the world. For that face I will scale those mountains.SOF-if-i-have-faith-that-can-move-mountains_web

Its because of that superhuman ability to put on a brave face and overcome obstacles that moms (and dads) are superheros. But in the darkness that sometimes creeps in, my son is my light.

And he will know Mommy isn’t perfect, but that imperfections make us human. Our flaws and our trials make us whole. And living and learning is part of being human.

6 thoughts on “Hello darkness my old friend.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s